Friday, September 29, 2006

PRO-MICHAEL SCHUMACHER VS. ANTI-MICHAEL SCHUMACHER

PRO-MICHAEL SCHUMACHER VS. ANTI-MICHAEL SCHUMACHER
By John Ross Harvey

When Michael Schumacher wins the pros say it’s because he’s the best.
The antis say it’s because the Ferrari is too good

When Michael Schumacher wins in the rain, the pros say it’s because he’s the best
The antis say it’s because the Ferrari is too good

When Michael Schumacher loses in the rain, the antis say it’s because he can’t drive well.
The pros blame it on the tires, back markers, pit crews, anything at all but their man

When Michael Schumacher loses and it didn’t rain, the antis say it’s because he’s no good
The pros blame it on the tires, back markers, pit crews, anything at all but their man

When rule changes are made to make Ferrari win, the antis blame on the FIA favouritism
The pros say all the better so their man can win as he’s supposed to

When rule changes are made to make Ferrari lose, the antis are very happy with them
The pros blame the results on FIA favouritism for the opposing teams

When a driver passes Michael Schumacher, the pros say they were lucky, or he missed a gear
The antis jump for joy and pour alcoholic beverages to celebrate

When Michael Schumacher wins a championship, the antis turn off the television
The pros jump for joy and pour alcoholic beverages to celebrate

When Michael Schumacher loses a championship, the pros blame it anti Ferrari paranoia
The antis jump for joy and pour alcoholic beverages to celebrate

When Michael Schumacher announced his retirement the pros claim he has nothing to prove
The antis blame it on his inability to face Raikonnen as his teammate

When Michael Schumacher hangs up his helmet for good, the pros will celebrate his career
The antis will celebrate the loss of the biggest cheat in the history or organized sport
And jump for joy and pour alcoholic beverages to celebrate.

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