Friday, June 29, 2007

Political Jargon

By John Ross Harvey

I’ve been reading Michael Moore recently
Dude, Where’s My Country
I have to say, highly entertaining and enlightening read.
But based on some of what I’ve read
Here are some political taglines, and other items, and what they mean.

Collateral Damage: We killed them, they didn’t kill us instead.
Casualties: They killed us, we didn’t kill them instead.
Terrorism: They killed us, we didn’t kill them instead
War on Terror: Protect our Oil
Smart Bombs: Not all that smart really, blowing up the wrong places.
Precision Strikes: We let go a few bombs, didn’t really check where they’d land
Free the Iraqi People: Take control of their government to protect our Oil
The Taliban: Former partners with Texas Oil Companies
Bin Laden: Everyone except that Osama guy is our friend, because of Oil
Osama: We don’t like this son of theirs
Saddam: A Dictator that had nothing to do with Al Qaeda
Oil: Plastic and Gasoline, we depend on this stuff, it controls the government
Election: Where the state of the brother of a candidate can fix its results
God: Believe me, and Michael, he wants nothing to do with George W.
God Bless America: Why? Canada is much nicer, bless us instead.
Terrorist Cells: Suspected Evildoers that they actually found
Guantanamo Bay: Where all rights of the imprisoned cease to exist, regardless of guilt
9-11: Ok, that’s month and day; it should be 11-9, which is day and month

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