Paper Cuts

Originally posted Aug. 21 2005 at www.threeforcesofevil.typepad.com

PAPER CUTS
By John Ross Harvey


Why is it that a paper cut hurts worse than a knife cut?
Cold steel vs. flimsy paper
You would expect a real knife to be very painful.
Yet usually, a simple “Darn it, I’m bleeding!” will suffice.
When paper slices you, every bad word you’ve ever known gets blurted.
Even if you don’t see the blood, it hurts!
Is the absolute flatness of paper what makes it so painful?
I do believe it does, yes.
But there’s more to it.
What is paper made of?
Wood.
What did people use before they discovered steel?
Wood.
So essentially, a paper cut is a wood cut.
A paper cut is equivalent to a splinter.
Splinters hurt like hell!
The worst thing is, you can’t pull a paper splinter out.
It just hurts until you forget about it.
Remember the warnings, never run with scissors.
Change it to never run with paper.
Just my luck, all I do is print and copy papers.
My hands may never heal.