Autocad

Originally posted at www.threeforcesofevil.typepad.com
For all the many drafters at Focus Fanatics

AUTOCAD
By John Ross Harvey

I am a Draftsman or Draughtsman that uses AutoCad
I started in the Dark ages of 1987
We used version 2.3 on orange screens
Next year we had colour on version 9!
After graduating Architecture Technology in 1988
Most of the workforce had no idea what Autocad was.
I was hand drafting until 1992.
Then I was sent by my employer to learn Autocad 12.
Autocad 12 was so good it wasn’t replaced by 13 until about 1995.
Autocad 14 showed up around 1997,
And LT97 and LT98 were less expensive options.
Neither of those ever equaled 12 for ease of use.
2000 came out next; lets not call it 15, just 2000.
This was more like 12, plus a few nice features.
2002 was identical, 2004 –5 were newer still.
Nobody in his or her right mind actually pays to own this.
Most companies can write off a few thousands for it
The average guy cannot.
There are three ways of using Autocad
Tablet users are an eccentric bunch, everything in its place.
Mouse users create buttons galore to only use their mouse.
Keyboard-mouse users like myself make hundreds of short key commands
In order to avoid carpel tunnel from mouse pointing all the time.
I’ve always found this last style faster.
The only problem is certain keyboard keys if missed slightly
Create entirely different outcomes.
2@<45 is very different from 22,45
22,45 is a defined location, exact coordinates
2@<45 is a relative location from its starting point 2 units at 45 degrees.
Imperial is easier to work with, because an inch is an inch not a foot
Metric units could be millimeters, centimeters, or meters
It all depends on the creator of the drawing.
Conversion to imperial could be simple if Metric were always one unit.
Sadly even though it is base 10 and simple, 1,10, and 100 do not all equal.
How much simpler life would be if it were easy.
AutoCad was never meant to be easy.
A DWG isn’t a DWG in every version; it’s a v2000 DWG or v2004 DWG
A JPG universal it is not.
That’s why it changes every two years and costs $1000’s
In the immortal words of Survivor’s Rupert
WE BE PIRATES!

SIX DEGREES OF KEVIN BACON-ODE TO PAUL REISER

SIX DEGREES OF KEVIN BACON-ODE TO PAUL REISER
By John Ross Harvey

One of the best Sitcoms ever on TV
Mad About You starring Paul Reiser
Had taken a movie theme
Six Degrees of Separation
And changed it for Kevin Bacon
Of which nearly everyone could
Become within Six Degrees.
My radio station just asked for anyone
To tell of your brush w/ fame
And one of the people I met
The late great James Doohan
Gave me 3 degrees of Kevin Bacon
James Doohan and Christian Slater were in ST-VI
Christian Slater was in Murder in the First
With Kevin Bacon
John Harvey-James Doohan-Christian Slater-Kevin Bacon
3 degrees
How many do you have?

Good For You

GOOD FOR YOU
By John Ross Harvey

When I was young
My parents told me to eat my vegetables
They were good for me
Well, I agreed on carrots and corn
But nothing else
I have added squash and broccoli over my lifetime
Green beans are only edible hot
Peas are never happening.
Today what’s good for you has changed
Stuff I never heard of before
Is now what advertisers say is good.
Omega-3
Pro-biotic culture
Say what?
Omega-3 sounds like a space super hero
Pro-biotic culture sounds like
A say yes to robots consortium
What did they call this when we were young?
Omega-3 is apparently fish oil
Cod liver perhaps
But what is a pro-biotic culture?
Found in yoghurt of all things
Programmed Bionic Tics?
I’m not eating that!

Architecture

ARCHITECTURE
By John Ross Harvey

To most of the world previous to the year 1992 AD
Architecture meant one thing
Buildings
Offices, Malls, Towers, Houses, etc.
After this time
Computer Networks have labeled themselves
As System Architecture
And Hiring System Architects
When you are an unemployed draftsman
And the only Architecture listed in the Classifieds
Is Computer system networks
You tend to get a little ANGRY!!!!!!!
Architecture also has controversy
The title of World’s Tallest Building is a major contention
Canadians agree that the CN Tower is
And rightfully so at 1,816ft it is.
Americans claim that Sears has been since 1974 at 1,736ft
Or 1,450 ft without the antenna
Because their claim is that a Structure is not a Building
And that CN is a Structure and an Antenna
But Sears is allowed to include their antenna
Or discount CN as a structure
It’s really just a loser’s way to cheat
Not including antennas
Petronas towers 1 and 2 are 1,483 ft
And Taipei 101 is 1,473 ft.

A breakdown to denounce CN as a building is as follows according to aaskyscrapers.com:

Title Building Location Height
Tallest building to the structural or architectural top. Taipei 101 Taipei 1,671 ft (509m)
Tallest building to the highest occupied floor. Taipei 101 Taipei 1,437 ft (438m)
Tallest building to the top of the roof. Taipei 101 Taipei 1,473 ft (449m)
Tallest building to the top of antenna. Sears Tower Chicago 1,736 ft (529m)
Tallest Structure KTHI TV-Tower Fargo (ND) 2,063 ft (629m)
Tallest free standing structure Petronius Platform Petronius field 2,000 ft (606m)
Tallest free standing structure on land CN Tower Toronto 1,816 ft (554m)

Define a building then
Can you live, work, eat and sleep in it?
By that definition you are limited to Condos and residences
Can you walk on floors in it?
By that definition CN is a building
Agreed a TV tower is an antenna structure
CN does have one within it
So do all the other buildings laying claim to its title
The oil platform is mostly below water, so discount it for now.
If Fargo wants to call its antenna a building
Many would disagree with that
Eiffel Tower was a structure also, but you can walk in it
It has floors and held the World’s Tallest Building title for many years.
Suddenly as Sears was beaten by CN in a matter of months
The definition suddenly changed to allow Sears to hold the title
Visit the CN Tower homepage and you will find very differently
That it has been recognized since 1996, though in reality it was 1975.

http://www.cntower.ca/portal/SmartDefault.aspx?at=943

People have a real difficulty losing to Canada
That’s why many race fans hate Jacques Villeneuve
Even though they adore his late father.
If Canada wins, the competition aim to change the rules
That is why many illogical minded associations and the like
Still to this day claim that CN tower is not a building.
Like the above chart, ridiculous beyond words.
Face it, reality sucks, unless you win.
You lost to Canada; deal with it.

PLUTO-THE NON-PLANET

PLUTO-THE NON-PLANET
By John Ross Harvey

The Astronomical Society has officially
Demoted Pluto from a Planet to a Dwarf
It was already in a different orbital plane
From the other planets
So now it’s not a planet
Will Disney change the name of the dog
From Pluto to Dwarf Pluto?
What about the moons of larger planets
The Gas Giants of Jupiter and Saturn
Have moons bigger than Earth and Mars
Do they now get upgraded to Planet status
Because Pluto is a Dwarf?
Will Mercury be demoted?
What does it take to keep your status as a planet?
An I.D. card?
Your orbit is off-kilter; you can’t be a planet anymore!
At least Pluto is having fun
Not spinning endlessly on the same path
Pluto deserves respect
Tell those Astronomers that you believe in Pluto
The Happy Planet!

REDNECKS-ODE TO JEFF FOXWORTHY

REDNECKS-ODE TO JEFF FOXWORTHY
By John Ross Harvey

I’m not pretending to be Jeff Foxworthy
I love his Redneck stuff
And his other stuff
Just bought Blue Collar Boys last DVD
But there is a perception that all Rednecks
Live in the Southern US of A
No
There is a perception that all Rednecks
Watch NASCAR
No, but a few drive NASCAR
There was a Welsh-Canadian guy
Formerly of Air Farce before he passed away
That did Mike… from Canmooooooooore
That’s in Alberta
That was a Canadian Redneck
Red Green is a Canadian Redneck
He has more uses for Duct Tape than MacGuyver
Now that Juan Pablo Montoya will drive NASCAR
He becomes a Columbian Redneck
If Jacques Villeneuve joins him
He’ll become a French-Canadian Redneck that lives in Monaco
Christian Fittipaldi became a Brazilian Redneck and
Adrian Fernandez became a Mexican Redneck
When they joined NASCAR
The Ballad of Ricky Bobby is another Redneck
That also drives NASCAR
Paul Tracy didn’t have to drive NASCAR to become a Redneck
He lives in Arizona
His neck is always Red
He also has a title fight every race he hits somebody
That happens a lot
There is no rule for where you have to be to be a Redneck
NASCAR just helps bring out the inner Redneck
I’m going to go watch some F1.

Beef

BEEF
By John Ross Harvey

Beef is an Acronym for itself
Beef Extremely Excellent Food
Beef makes Money
Fast Food Restaurants love Beef
10 Billion Burgers and Counting
Fancier Restaurants love Beef
Nothing better than a Prime Rib
Or a Juicy Steak
Mad Cow Disease changes this
In 1996 on my tour of Britain
We ate lots of Chicken
Because British Beef was under a Mad Cow Ban
We immediately went to McDonalds in Ireland
Every time a Cow is found to have Mad Cow
All Beef production is banned from Export
Whether the Cow got Mad Cow in Canada or NOT
As was the case of the Cow found in the USA
But it was born in Alberta
So it must have been born with Mad Cow
That’s USA logic for you
It’s sick so it was born that way
Not it’s sick here, so we have a problem
No we bought it from Canada so it’s their problem
I’d much rather eat Beef from Canada than the USA
At least we know when Mad Cow happens
As opposed to claiming where it happens
Alberta Beef
Nothing Better
It never entered the Food Chain
Apparently that fact went over their heads
So some Beef producers are selling Burgers
At their own restaurant
Because American ones can’t do Logic
Do Canadians a favour
Buy Beef and eat it too!

Pork

PORK
By John Ross Harvey

Pork is a universal catchphrase for Pig meat
Bacon, Ham, Pork Chops, Pork Ribs, Pig Feet, Pig Tail
All are Pork
All are amazingly good to eat
Bacon can be added to virtually anything
Yet the Pork industry markets itself as
The Other White Meat
Chops, yes, perhaps
Ham is quite pink
Bacon is mostly pink
Yet you cannot eat a Pink chop
Because you’ll get food poisoning
Pork is a pain in the rump

Chicken

CHICKEN
By John Ross Harvey

Chicken can be many things
A name associated with cowardice
A misplaced moniker for Tuna
But generally it’s tasty meat
Fried is very tasty and KFC makes millions on it
Roasted is also tasty
Rotisseried or BBQ’d is also very good
Boiled is Bland and Boring
Chicken is White Meat and Dark Meat
Many prefer one to the other
Meat lovers like me eat both
But Swiss Chalet Rotisserie w/ sauce
Is heavenly
Maybe that’s why they burn the wings?

Screwdrivers

SCREWDRIVERS
By John Ross Harvey

I’m not talking about Vodka and Orange Juice
I’m talking about the common tool
The screwdriver
There are 3 main types
Standard or Flat Head
Phillips or Cross Head
Robertson or Square Head
First and foremost throw away the first two
They are 100% useless
The best way to destroy a screw is for that screw
To be a Phillips or Standard head
Robertson’s don’t get destroyed; they work!
There are 3 main colours to identify a Robertson
Black, Red, and Green, for Big, Medium, and Small
If you are a Screwdriver Producer
Like Craftsman or Snap-On or whoever
DO NOT MAKE USELESS SCREWDRIVERS THOSE COLOURS!
When you are looking for a real screwdriver
And ask for the Red one, you shouldn’t get a Flat Head!
Yellow, Blue, or Orange are OK
NEVER USE BLACK, RED, OR GREEN!!!!!!!!!!!!
For all the toy and furniture companies
An Allen Key or Hex-head is OK, thanks IKEA
But if you want to use real screws
USE ROBERTSONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Flat Head and Cross Head are OBSOLETE!!!!!!!
Never use them ever again!
Now I need a Screwdriver.
The Vodka variety.

COUNTRY SONG FOR MY LIFE

COUNTRY SONG FOR MY LIFE
By John Ross Harvey

Face it; no music format does life stories better than Country
There are more autobiographical hits there than any format
So I’ll write one here for me, and any musicians
Reading it that put it to music, are my new best friend(s).

“Born in a Steel Town”

I was born in a Steel Town
Raised near a Candy Factory
Moved to a Small Town
With a Small Phone Directory
I went to School
I moved Away
Bought a House
I’m here to Stay

Chorus:
Small Town Boy
Works in the Big City
Works for far less than he should
Trying to improve that if he could
When that happens you know he would

College life was sort of fun
All-nighters for many but not this one
Deans list honours did I get
My final semester you’d never bet
My first apartment
My first car
All my friends
Hoping to become a Star

Chorus (repeat)

Working life was tough and mean
Several times were really lean
Out of work more than once
Not my choice as I’m no dunce
Architects that couldn’t draw
Cinemas with a management flaw
Government course to
Computer consultants I never saw

Chorus (repeat)

My next company made airplanes
And now I’m with a Contractor
Drawing until I go insane
Time is always a factor
I took a course in comedy
As I needed a little brevity
Writing for my blog
Sure relieves the stress in me

Chorus (repeat)

Years ago I took a course
In an auto racing school
Lots of funds
For so much fun
In a sport where money rules
Have my own helmet
Go karting for charity
F1 would be better with me

Chorus (repeat)

Now I’m hoping to write a book
Of all my comedy
And produce a board game
Traffic related because that’s me
I don’t claim to be George Carlin
My game is not like Cranium
The Blue Collar boys could be my friends
My goals may never end

Chorus (final)

Addiction Volume II

ADDICTION VOLUME II
By John Ross Harvey

No doubt you’ve noticed your newspaper
It has always had puzzles
Crossword, Jumble, Word Search etc.
All letter puzzles
Until recently
Sudoku
So addictive it gets it’s own page.
9 x 9 grid w/ number 1-9
1-9 per row horizontal
1-9 per column vertical
1-9 per 3 x 3 box
My wife insisted I try it
Being a numbers person
Well, I’m hooked
I may not always succeed
But I plug away
And erase away
They bought me the electronic handheld
It comes with a light pen
The easy levels are better
They tell you what’s wrong
The hard levels are still too hard
Because they don’t
Perhaps a 16 x 16 grid is next stage
But an 8 x 8 would be better.

Food Rules

FOOD RULES
By John Ross Harvey

Ketchup is for children under 10
It doesn’t belong on eggs or grilled cheese sandwiches
I do not need therapy

Mandarin oranges belong in Jell-O
Other oranges can be eaten as is

Steak must be eaten first to prevent it from becoming overdone
Well done is an oxymoron, it isn’t
Medium rare is a perfectly done steak

Vegetables must be eaten first
Unless it’s a steak dinner

Mixed foods are not allowed unless you created that mix
And actually enjoy it
Cranberries and Rice are a perfect example of a mix I enjoy
Ketchup and Eggs never will be

Chocolate is always welcome

Potato chips (crisps to some) are very addictive and
The bags are too small

I must wait for allergy-affected friends of my children to leave
Before I eat any Peanut product, and so should you.
I could eat peanuts for hours, but not while they are around.

Pizza requires meat and cheese
Vegetables are already accounted for in the tomato sauce.
That’s enough.

Burgers require cheese and bacon, not lettuce and tomato.

Salad isn’t food.
According to John Pinette it’s a promisary note that food will arrive.
Meat is food.

Carb counters hate bread
I love bread, especially Rye bread or Pumpernickel
I don’t count carbs

Fried potatoes, (home fries or French fries (chips) to some)
Baked potatoes, or Mashed are acceptable w/ a meat meal
Scalloped is not
In Ireland however you might get all of these

Anything you can count must be divided evenly
If there are 21 Smarties, you must make 22
And if the colours are not even, you have to fix that too

It costs $25 to feed a family at McDonald’s and still be hungry
It costs $26 for an overpriced Pizza and a 32oz Coke at Wonderland
We were no longer hungry
Imagine if we bought the Pizza elsewhere?
It might have been $14.

Exercise in Futility

EXERCISE IN FUTILITY
By John Ross Harvey

Today we were being photographed for a company booklet
Or some such thing
Our Manager had us meet for the photographer
Who was late
And the photographer would not shoot
Until the Marketing guy was there
Since there are about 10 of really busy
We left after this point
We can’t wait around for some guy to show up
We have work to do
The marketing guy wanted to have our picture
In front of the Cappuccino machine
Granted as a draftsman many of them need the caffeine
But that is not our work environment
We took our picture at our reference/drawing table
Holding “props”
I held tracing paper, but was not allowed to move my arm
To my back
This was an exercise in futility
We work in front of a computer screen like everyone else
These photos will look staged
Because they are
Next we’ll be holding Blueprints!

The Three R's

THE THREE R’S
By John Ross Harvey

The three R’s have never been Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic
Because that’s an R, W, and an A
The three R’s of today are Reduce, Reuse, Recycle
Since everything costs more, and my salary has not improved
Reduce is how one must survive
Reuse depends on the product, but Popcorn buckets from
The Cinemas are very handy
Recycle, plastic, cans, newspaper, cardboard
I do try to put all of this out
My daughter is more into the Reuse portion
Any recyclable product not sent to the bin
Will be reused by my daughter and turned into
Some kind of toy house for any of her toys
And left all over the house
If I ask if I can throw it out in the recycling
I get the sad face with puppy dog eyes
So I have to sneak it out when she’s not looking
Invariably she’ll create these the day before
Recycling gets picked up
And I have to wait for a week
When I was young we just read the boxes
That’s also an R

Blackout 2003 Anniversary

BLACKOUT 2003 ANNIVERSARY
By John Ross Harvey

August 14 2003, around 4:10 pm Eastern
The Entire East Coast lost power
From Montreal down to Texas
From what I can remember
As I seem to have a knack for avoiding major catastrophes
I was already on highway home when this hit
I suddenly had no radio
Though my town was back up by 2am next morning
Most of Toronto was not for close to 3 days
It was a great night to BBQ
And one of the best steaks I ever cooked
What do you remember? Where were you when it hit?

Traffic Phrases

TRAFFIC PHRASES
By John Ross Harvey

When people block an intersection say the following:

“If you don’t fit, don’t be a twit.”
“Blocking the intersection; means your brain has malfunctioned.”
“If you can’t cross it, don’t block it.”

If somebody tries to drive around you in a lane full of parked cars
Say the following:

“Funny thing about traffic, people don’t tend to park in the left lane.”
“Pathetic Parked Car Passing Putz!”
“You mean to tell me way up high in your SUV, you cannot see a parked car?”

If your in a turning lane and someone drives around you from a non-turning lane
To make a turn, say the following:

“Do you suffer from Directional Deficit Disorder?”
“What planet are you from that turning right from a left lane is normal?”
“Your inability to read a road sign is only equaled by your lack of intelligence.”

If somebody uses an escape lane which is ending quickly to pass cars that are obeying the
Rules of the road say the following:

“Does the picture indicating your lane has ended not big enough for your poor vision?”
“Lost Lane Loser!”
“The only thing you’re proving is your stupidity.”

If a car lane hops from left to right and back and forth to get positively nowhere
Say the following:

“Lane hopping increases your travel distance.”
“Staying in one lane is faster.”
“Cutting people off only increases your enemies.”
“You must be drunk, you can’t even drive straight.”
“What has your car done to you, that you increase its probability to crash?”

When a smoker throws his butt out the window
Say the following:

“The world is not your ashtray!”
“My tires don’t appreciate your litter.”
“Stick your butt up your own!”

When a “Ricer” drives around manhole covers in front of you
Say the following:

“If you didn’t drop your car your paint wouldn’t get scratched.”
“It’s only a HONDA, it’s not special.”
“Driveway curbs must be like Mt. Everest if a manhole is too high!”
“Fast and Furious was a joke, not a lifestyle.”
“Your brake lights are PINK!”

Career Comparison

CAREER COMPARISON
JACQUES VILLENEUVE VS. MICHAEL SCHUMACHER
By John Ross Harvey

Michael Schumacher:

1991 Given ride in Jordan at Spa, qualified well and retired while his teammate DeCesaris practically won that race before he retired. Was stolen by Benetton after that event.
1992 Had a reasonable showing but no match for Mansell and Williams
1993 Prost and Williams were much better, managed to win eventually
1994 Against Hill at Williams in Illegal Benetton car won races and hit Hill to take title
1995 Team acquired same engines as Williams, won more races, and championship. Teammates were subservient from this point on.
1996 Hill and Villeneuve were class of field at Williams, Michael now at Ferrari.
1997 In final race of season he attempted to take out Villeneuve for title but lost having all of his points removed for the season
1998 McLaren now class of field, won a few events
1999 Accident early in season promotes Irvine to #1 at Ferrari, Michael’s return helps Irvine in championship to a point, but his sudden inability to win final race over Hakkinen makes Hakkinen champion again, unwilling to give Irvine 1st Ferrari WDC in 20 years.
2000 Indestructible Ferrari dominates giving Michael 3rd championship
2001 Yet another Ferrari domination and title #4
2002 Ferrari so dominant that Michael steals setups and racecar from Rubens on several occasions and only helps Rubens achieve 2nd rather than race him outright as the car suited Rubens better than himself and had Rubens move many times but none worse than Austria fiasco.
2003 Team orders ruled illegal but Ferrari adjust pit stops to allow Michael domination within team. New point system allows Raikonnen to almost take title with just 1 win.
2004 More dominant than 2002 and title #7
2005 Renault strong out of the box, Ferrari’s only win at Indianapolis fiasco. Funny that fiascos and Schumacher’s Ferrari go hand in hand. Alonso champion.
2006 After various rule changes to favour Ferrari, Renault and Alonso lead are slipping away as Schumacher closes with a few race wins in a row. Hungary shows he’s lost it. Blocking drivers and cutting chicanes without ever getting penalized, retires but inherits a point after a BMW is disqualified.

Jacques Villeneuve:

1993 Finishes 3rd in Formula Atlantic behind teammate and David Empringham
1994 Promoted to CART (Champcar) wins rookie title.
1995 Wins many races including Indy500 but drove 505 with a 2 lap penalty and wins CART championship
1996 Joins Williams in F1, grabs pole and almost wins in debut race, but for an oil leak. Keeps title battle between Hill and himself, Hill wins after Jacques loses a wheel.
1997 Dominant over new teammate Frentzen, wins title after Schumacher attempts to remove him in final race, gifts Hakkinen his first win with Coulthard’s help.
1998 Williams use customer Mechachrome engines, which are no match for McLaren. Very poor results.
1999 Joins BAR (Pollack team bought Tyrrell) in order to develop new team and has scoreless season.
2000 Yet another development year with poor results
2001 Manages a podium finish with improved BAR Honda
2002 Ferrari untouchable
2003 Poor reliability issues and personal vendetta by team boss David Richards forces Jacques to retire and be replaced by Sato at BAR
2004 Out most of season returns for final 3 events at Renault and out qualifies Alonso once, and beats Schumacher on track once, but scores no points against former team BAR
2005 Joins Sauber, and partnered with Massa, had measure of Massa near end of season but reliability had him finish with less points.
2006 Sauber bought by BMW, strong qualifying and a few better finishes against highly touted German teammate Heidfeld are not enough for team manager Theissen, who forces Jacques out of team after a race accident, to be replaced by Polish rookie Kubica, who was disqualified in his first race.

Me Society

ME SOCIETY
By John Ross Harvey

Today’s society is becoming very annoying
Everyone else thinks everything else is theirs
And theirs alone
My wife took our two kids, and one friend to the pool
The friend has Red Cross level 8, at age 9
For a 2-hour public swim, they paid to get in
A gatekeeper checked hand stamps, (never had gatekeeper before)
They swam in the shallow pool for about 1 1/2hrs
A lifeguard asks why my wife has three kids
“You can’t have three kids.”
There’s 20 minutes left
“This boy has level 8 Red Cross, he’s fine.”
“He needs to do two laps of the pool for me.”
Not exactly a public relations master
Also that same day
My son and his friend were using Diving rings
Another boy took them
And had his mother claim my son took them from him
Well my wife didn’t let that slide
Informed her that the rings (toys) are public not her son’s
Then she claimed my wife had attitude
If your child can manipulate you to do their dirty work
You are a bad parent
Regularly at this pool there are lockers, which require
Inserting a quarter to take the key
Many of these lockers are keyless, with lock engaged
In order to prevent door closure
As some people think that a PUBLIC locker
Is their PRIVATE property
The gatekeepers need to be checking for keys
Not hand stamps
And if a lifeguard can’t do their job for ¾ of their time
How did they become a lifeguard?

GET RICH QUICK

GET RICH QUICK
By John Ross Harvey

I’ve recently come across some items
That had I been in a position to do
Would have netted me some serious cash

Highway billboards
Facing two highways can net $100000/month
Pretty serious coin
Can I add one to my house’s roof? I shall investigate

Urinal pucks
Pretty much work until the urinal is used
How fresh to you think the air is
While they are being urinated upon
People buy these things
They cannot possibly be effective
Quick money for useless product

Taxi companies have rolling advertisements on their hubcaps
I have tried to convince some beer companies to use my wheels
But they declined my offer to advertise
I suppose there are more taxis than there are me
Shame really, as I’m much better at driving
I’d love to get some of that cash
Perhaps I need to clone myself

Selling phone service for less money than Bell
Just signed up for Rogers phone
The sales guy said it was the easiest pitch of his life
Same service, less money
He gets paid to sign us up, very well
Too bad I hate sales

What do you think is a quick money scheme?

Bad Parenting

BAD PARENTING
By John Ross Harvey


There are many example of bad parenting
The evidence is in the children
If they disrespect you or others, their parents are bad too
If they terrorize other children on their pocket bikes
Their bad parents handed over, as they are no more than a wallet
To their kids, and have zero parenting skills whatsoever
If the kids play on anybody’s lawn that isn’t their own
Without permission, it’s the bad parents to blame
There are many people you would expect to be a bad parent
Based on their projected persona
And very often you would be making a correct assessment.

I firmly believe that good parents respect their children
And other people’s children
They don’t speed in residential neighbourhoods
Or ignore school zones, or school buses.
They don’t pay off their children with motorized weapons.

I am glad to say that I am not a bad parent
I wish many of my neighbours were
Yet they continue to prove otherwise
By speeding, buying pocket bikes, and
Having their children play wherever they please
Without any permission

A child may get hurt or die by acting in that manner
Some parents have no heart at all.